Life Music

Sometimes, I wish that I had a constant soundtrack for my life. That, whenever something big happened, or just when I was walking down the street, there was the perfect song playing in my head, without the help of an i-Pod. If anything, they hinder my life soundtrack because the shuffle mode can't be relied upon to choose the right song for the moment. I know that I'm not the only one who's experienced a truly amazing moment just in time to hear "Baby Got Back."

What I need is a personal assistant who has a database of awesome songs; like the guys (or girls) who choose what song to play at a certain part of a movie (is there an official title for that?) to follow me as I go about my day and just know what song to play when.

Anyway, I heard a song recently that I would definitely play in my life soundtrack a few times a week, when I feel like nothing makes much sense, and the world seems so big, uncertain, and scary. This song would play after reading the first page of the newspaper, or watching the news, and then going outside for a walk to clear your head of the dark things. Cue song...now.

The Heart of Life - John Mayer

The little things.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Mainly, I've asked myself questions, and the answers have really had a great effect on me.

See, I've been really stressed lately. It tags along with the 13 credits I have to cram into the next 3 weeks.

Usually, I do not handle stress well. I get panicky, irritable, and just want to sleep until all my burdens are gone or overdue. Essentially, stress makes me its minion, and stress tends to feed off of refined carbohydrates and sugar, usually in the form of chocolate chip cookies. Once stress leaves, however, I am the only one that's left to deal with the consequences.

Anyway, I started getting stressed last week, and I could feel myself just breaking down under the pressure, and while I was having a really good cry about it, I asked myself what good all this did. Did I honestly believe that I couldn't achieve this, that I couldn't see myself through a mess I admittedly signed up for? Why was I saying I couldn't do it?

Of course I could do it. For the first time, instead of cowering behind the fear that I couldn't do something, I found strength in proving to everyone, and most importantly myself, that I could.

So, now, instead of letting stress and worry get me down, I let it force me to be confident in myself and my abilities, and to trust that things will work out.

The most annoying thing about stress was that it gave me a sort of tunnel vision. I could only focus on what I had to do, and how little time I had to do it. I was completely oblivious to the amazing things going on around me. Forcing myself to see around the stress has really let me stop worrying about the big things I can't control, and to really enjoy the little things. Of which, of course, I have photos of, just to remind myself.

Little things I have been witness to lately have been:

A flower growing in a pile of weeds and roadside trash.

The vibrancy of the Corvallis Farmer's Market reflected in tomatoes.

A summer league championship game. Oh, and playing with Ev's DSLR.

A wonderful sunset.

Stress and worry isn't worth missing out on nifty things like these. Evan bought me the ring at the beginning of this post, and looking down and reading that promise to Live, Love, and Laugh has only made my resolve to not let my anxieties about silly things (they will certainly seem petty in the long-run; of that I'm sure) get the best of me.

I promise.

Farmer's Market!

Evan and I decided to swing down to the Corvallis Farmer's Market this last weekend because it was a gorgeous day, and because this event has been going on steadily every weekend we've lived here (and probably a few thousand years before) and we've steadily slept through it every weekend.

We usually save our Saturday "dates" for the evening, opting to stay inside and be hermits for the day. Switching it up was fun, minus the fact that we emerged into the early afternoon sun like a pair of moles, squinting and shying away from the bright light.

Anyway, we headed down a few blocks, and we had a really good time. At the risk of sounding like a travel brochure, the Corvallis waterfront is really nicely laid out, and even though there were a lot of people, it was comfy. The vendors were really nice, and had samples of just about everything, including some homemade french bread, which I painfully had to pass on. Instead, I took my carb-frustrations out on some organic cauliflower.

I could never make it look as good as that bread.

Next, we hit up the local artisan's market, which was also very cool. Not Saturday Market cool, but I can see how living in puny Corvallis would stifle your creativity.

Why is it that we are so tempted to buy homemade stuff we don't need? I don't even drink tea. But I wanted it.

I wasn't so tempted by these, as I don't need an already dented...thing.

Another prime example of something that I totally fell in love with, and I have no idea why.

After we perused all the things we wanted for no reason and thankfully couldn't afford, we just meandered around Corvallis. Actually, that's not true. Evan ended up buying an elephant carved out of wood. It was five bucks because it was missing a tusk, so we named it Tusko, after the elephant that had a tusk removed at the Oregon Zoo.

It's funny to think I've been here for four years and I haven't really explored the town outside of campus. I always used to scoff at New Yorkers who'd say they had lived there their entire lives and they've never been to Times Square, but now I can relate.

There is also some pretty nifty architecture in this town. I'm impressed that Corvallis had the foresight to save some of its earliest buildings. I actually really like learning about architecture, and if I wasn't completely inept with all things even remotely mathematical, I would have considered being an architect. Oh well. Taking pictures will have to suffice.

This building used to be a general store in 1908 or something, and now it houses a Sprint store and disgruntled college students.


Same building. I love that some guy has been forced to climb up the building and paint those little decorations bright blue for the last 100 years.


This is the City Hall. We can actually see it from our apartment, and the bells still ring out the hours, which I like. I'm sorry I caught the flag looking so droopy.

Overall, it was a really great afternoon. I'm sure there will be more Corvallis exploration adventures, even if the town is only about 5 miles long.

sdrawkcab

If you haven't figured it out already, the title of this is the word "backwards" written backwards. This is because I've started to notice that I do a lot of things backwards. It's not something I do on purpose, but it's definitely something that people have asked about.

So, yeah. I tend to read newspapers, magazines, operation manuals, and menus backwards. Also, when I resume a book, I open it to the last page and work my way to my saved spot (I never use bookmarks, because it frustrates me to no end when you put all your trust into a stupid bookmark and then the damn thing slides out, leaving you to remember the page anyway), and when I take a test, I always, always, start with the last question.

I can't imagine three 6 year-olds being so enthralled by the newspaper, but she is reading it backwards, for what it's worth.

The only one I can maybe explain is the test one. A lot of my upper division classes had the fantastic short answer portion for the last 5 or so questions, and I like to do those while the information is still completely fresh in my mind. I am not a good test taker, and when I get nervous, my brain likes to take a vacation to the Bahamas while I have a small coronary in the non-air-conditioned classroom. Plus, a lot of what professors tend to ask on the short answer pops up again in the multiple choice (or my favorite, matching or fill-in-the-blank) which takes away the anxiety one feels when trying to choose between A or C. Or maybe it's E, which says that both A and C are correct.

It almost always goes something like this. Not pleasant.

I have absolutely no idea why I do any of the others that way. It's not like I enjoy reading the endings to all the articles before I even know what the headline is.


Maybe I started thinking about this quirky (which sounds better than just plain ol' strange) routine because I am currently unemployed and was thinking about what sort of unique skills I could put on a resume to make myself more appealing. Alas, this little habit of mine probably doesn't make the list.

I've decided that overall, I don't really like the hiring process. I feel like a resume is just a place for you to flaunt yourself, the interview is where your potential boss measures the real you to the resume you, and the "call-back" step is just to test your patience with other people, because your resume said you were patient.

Which I'm not, by the way. At all.

Yep.

Totally Cool Stuff Tuesday #5...?

It has been a while since I posted a totally cool stuff Tuesday list, because my life has revolved mainly around Fundamentals of Accounting, which sucks the fun out of just about everything. But, I have found myself with some rare free time (or so I hope. I probably have a midterm tomorrow that I didn't know about) so I thought I'd update a bit.

1. Nintendo Wii - I received one of these from my mom and I finally found the time to play it, and I am already addicted. I think Evan, an avid lover of all things Xbox 360, is even warming up to it, especially since his beloved 360 officially bit the dust a few weeks ago. Wii wins!
2. Nick Brandt photography- Seriously, these pictures took my breath away. This is wildlife photography at its absolute finest. Below are two examples, but totally check out his website to see some more of his amazing work.

3. White Old Navy flip-flops - I am putting this on here because they will most likely only be white for this week, and so I will treasure them. I don't know why I do this every year, but I am compelled to buy a pair of $2.50 white flip-flops every summer. They are just the perfect, lazy college student's footwear, because the white color somehow makes up for the fact that they are the cheapest form of footwear available. Anyway, this summer, I resolved not to, only to be given a pair for my birthday. C'est la vie, right? Maybe next year when I'm actually getting a paycheck I will splurge and get a pair of real sandals, but for now, these are wonderful, and still white.

4. The satisfying feeling of getting really cool pictures- I know I've slacked on posting pictures, but it's because Blogger feels the need to frustrate me when I try to post them, and seeing as how I tend to be impatient, this results in my storming away and no pictures ever getting posted. Today, I will triumph.

Steps leading to one of many waterfalls at Silver Falls State Park

One would think I was a flower enthusiast or a botany major with all the pictures I take of flowers, but truth is, I have no idea what any of these are. Nor do I care. I separate them out using a, "This one is pretty, this one is not, is this one poisonous?" system.

I don't know which one this is. But it was pretty.

This is at the Olympic Track Trials in Eugene (or as the clever newspeople called it, "The road from Eugene to Beijing") and this guy was the scrawniest of the bunch. I had my camera on drive mode, and I probably was very successful in annoying everyone in the stands with the constant, click, click, click, click...

The women's 1500 meters. I love their looks of determination. And, extra bonus: seeing them made me want to get to the gym a lot more often.
The three guys from Oregon who are going to Beijing. Okay, I'm going to be honest: I took this picture from the giant screen at the end of the Hayward field. If you can't be down there to take the picture, steal it from the Jumbo-Tron, I always say.

My favorite of the day. It took me 10 laps to get this one.

5. Summer -India Arie - I really like this song, because it's light and summery, which cheers me up when I'm stuck inside listening to cash-flow this and prokaryote that, watching summer go by through classroom windows. I hope you guys like it!

That's all for this week. Next week will be a lot less chaotic (knock on plastic desk) so I hope to get on here more often. Later days!

yays and nays

So, I know I've been gone for a while, but I plan to make it up to you guys with what will probably be a hugely long post. I've decided to copy our OSU newspaper, The Barometer by listing off recent events in my life as either "yays" or "nays." Here goes:

• Yay to graduating from college.

• Nay to summer classes after you've gone through the, "you're finally done!!" speech.

• Yay to getting 100 bucks for graduating from college.

• Nay to having to spend that 100 bucks on an accounting book, financial calculator, and Statistics 201 study guides.

• Yay to buying Unaccustomed Earth by Jhumpa Lahiri, one of my favorite authors.

• Nay to forgetting to bring it back with me to Corvallis.

• Yay for friends loaning you other books, like Caramelo, by Sandra Cisneros. I highly recommend it.

• Nay for friends, when you realize that they have all summer to be free and merry, while you're stuck in a 3.5 hour accounting class every. single. day. Starting at 8am.

• Yay to being completely done with said accounting class in three weeks, even if it means selling my soul to a financial calculator.

• Nay to not having AC in our apartment, which results in us yelling at each other to be heard over the fans and the roar of traffic (well...the few cars we have that pass by. It's Corvallis. Anything more than 12, and we call it traffic) that comes through our windows.

• Yay to 3.5 hour accounting classes, because they are held in a firmly refrigerated room. Seriously, I wear a sweatshirt to class, and I'm still shivering. This is a conundrum, because I have to peel it off as soon as I walk outside and realize that the sun has literally descended upon Corvallis.

• Nay to having to ponder the dilemma of either carrying your sweatshirt over your arm like a butler's towel, or doing the uber dorky tie-around-the-waist technique from 7th grade. The latter of which strongly rivals the fanny-pack in loser level fashion.

• Yay to getting the IKEA Stuff for my Sims2. I probably love building and decorating the houses for my Sims than actually playing the game. Now with the IKEA stuff, I'll never play, but that's okay, because my Sims will be living in style...in pause mode.

• Nay to never actually decorating anything because my life is dedicated to pumping out cash flow statements and balance sheets on Excel for the aforementioned devil of an accounting class.

• Yay to my birthday in 2 days. 21 has been a good year, and 22 will be even better. I am making sure of that.

• Nay to class stomping all over my birthday, since it is on a Tuesday, along with the crushing irony of the fact that I was always jealous of the kids whose birthdays fell during the school year, and their moms would bring cupcakes and punch, and that now my birthday is falling during the school year, my last school year ever, and it probably couldn't be less unpleasant. I don't even know if cupcakes or punch could make it better.

• Yay to funfetti cake, which my mom has made for almost all of my birthdays before college, and could maybe, potentially, hopefully, make having a birthday on a school day bearable.

• Nay to ruining about 3 weeks worth of exercise when I bite into a small country sized piece of funfetti cake on Tuesday.

• Yay to my parents, who are amazing, and without them, I wouldn't be here (literally) writing about how I made it through college and life. The best part of graduation was hearing them say, "We are so proud of you, mija." They love me even if I'm a chubster who loves her cake. And eats it too. (I couldn't help it.)

• Nay to my parents indulging my chubster fantasies by taking me to the Olive Garden for my birthday.

• Yay to Olive Garden breadsticks. They are the carb equivalent of Matt Damon in my fantasy dreams.

=

• Nay to not being able to think of a cute and clever way to end this post, because I am tired from an 8 hour class I had to take, and sore from shooting dart guns.

• Yay to ending the post on a positive note, with the promise (to the 5 people who read this blog) that I will write more often. And, speaking of notes, how about a song or two to leave you with? The first is Sea of Love by Cat Power, and the second is I'm Yours by Jason Mraz. Enjoy!

good day, bad night

Since we were given such a beautiful day on Sunday, the four of us decided to go miniature golfing. It was an awesome way to have fun and relax before us undergrad students settled into our desk chairs to study, and Geoff the grad student headed back up to Canada.


The day started out well. I decided to wear my best golfing polo, along with some yuppie knock off big sunglasses.


Evan also decided to wear a polo as well, although this is not out of the ordinary. He wears one just about every day.

Now, Travis was a sight. This kid only ever wears track pants and OSU (insert some sport here) t-shirts. I literally had to pick my jaw off the floor when I saw him in a polo, khaki shorts, and quite possibly the funniest hat I have ever seen. I think he wins the award for the day in the Exaggerated Golf Attire category.

This was by far the nicest mini golf place we've ever been to. Every little hole has a mini diagram for you to see before whacking your ball into the parking lot. Hole 11, as you see here, has a stream running through it, and, a piece of the turf was missing, to make it tricky.


An Evan, in his natural habitat.

So Travis didn't mind the diagram, and instead decided to rocket his ball into some bushes. Evan, being the good guy that he is, helped him out, while Geoff and I giggled like little girls and took pictures.

It's funny how much one concentrates to get a plastic little ball 4 meters.

This was a tough one. The hole was actually uphill and to the left, plus, there was a giant fake rock in the middle. This was at the top of the little hill. I (light blue ball) narrowly missed getting trapped in the fake rock, while Evan (dark blue ball) was much less fortunate.

Travis taking a shortcut to the next hole.


We couldn't pass up the chance to take a photo next to chainsaw carved bears. Who makes all these? And, how do they all look exactly the same? Ponder, and discuss. Also, notice the funny old man cap on the bear. :)

I'm sorry these are so bright, by the way. Geoff's big ol' thumb moved the setting on my camera to shutter speed, and it was set at a low one, which let all that wonderful afternoon sun into every picture.
Impatiently waiting for me to stop taking pictures and golf. I took this one and was shocked at how bright it was, and then I realized that the setting was off. The guys wouldn't let me take another one, though.


After golfing, we went to McMennamins to grab a drink, and we had a really good time. At the time of this picture, I had no idea what I was in for.

I knew that the pollen was terrible outside, so I made sure to take a Claritin before heading out. 24 hour relief, my a$$. Everything was fine until we got back home, and I rubbed my eye. Instantly, they started watering and I sneezed three times in a row.

It's over, I remember thinking. I've really done it.

Did I ever. I was up sneezing so hard for the next 6 hours, that I went through a whole box of Kleenex and Evan took an emergency trip to Freddies for more allergy meds. I tried everything: taking a benadryl, taking a shower, changing out of the clothes I had worn outside...ugh. The worst part was probably the fact that I couldn't do anything but be miserable. And when I'm miserable, my misery wants company, and it so happens that Evan was in the most cheerful mood ever. He was as happy as a little clam, and for some reason, it infuriated me. Why does that happen? Why, when we are sick, do we absolutely hate the people who can't be as cranky and irritable and sneezy and wheezy as we are? Poor guy. He should be applying for sainthood here soon if allergy season lasts much longer.

All in all, it was horrible. I honestly don't think anything could be worse than that. Maybe like, childbearing, but in that case you get something out of it. All I have today is a raw nose, sore muscles from sneezing, and a tummy ache from all the medication I took. Maybe it's Karma for being an absolute beast last night. That's probably it.

Anyway. It's time for bed. You can bet that Tylenol Allergy Multi-Symptom tablets made it onto my Totally Awesome Tuesday list!