The little things.

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Mainly, I've asked myself questions, and the answers have really had a great effect on me.

See, I've been really stressed lately. It tags along with the 13 credits I have to cram into the next 3 weeks.

Usually, I do not handle stress well. I get panicky, irritable, and just want to sleep until all my burdens are gone or overdue. Essentially, stress makes me its minion, and stress tends to feed off of refined carbohydrates and sugar, usually in the form of chocolate chip cookies. Once stress leaves, however, I am the only one that's left to deal with the consequences.

Anyway, I started getting stressed last week, and I could feel myself just breaking down under the pressure, and while I was having a really good cry about it, I asked myself what good all this did. Did I honestly believe that I couldn't achieve this, that I couldn't see myself through a mess I admittedly signed up for? Why was I saying I couldn't do it?

Of course I could do it. For the first time, instead of cowering behind the fear that I couldn't do something, I found strength in proving to everyone, and most importantly myself, that I could.

So, now, instead of letting stress and worry get me down, I let it force me to be confident in myself and my abilities, and to trust that things will work out.

The most annoying thing about stress was that it gave me a sort of tunnel vision. I could only focus on what I had to do, and how little time I had to do it. I was completely oblivious to the amazing things going on around me. Forcing myself to see around the stress has really let me stop worrying about the big things I can't control, and to really enjoy the little things. Of which, of course, I have photos of, just to remind myself.

Little things I have been witness to lately have been:

A flower growing in a pile of weeds and roadside trash.

The vibrancy of the Corvallis Farmer's Market reflected in tomatoes.

A summer league championship game. Oh, and playing with Ev's DSLR.

A wonderful sunset.

Stress and worry isn't worth missing out on nifty things like these. Evan bought me the ring at the beginning of this post, and looking down and reading that promise to Live, Love, and Laugh has only made my resolve to not let my anxieties about silly things (they will certainly seem petty in the long-run; of that I'm sure) get the best of me.

I promise.